Dear Teacher!

Yes, of course, you can ignore all the visual aides and sensory tools that we send to school for use with my children. Said no parent of an ASD child, ever!

I am growing rather tired of having the same conversations over and over again.

And it all has to do with the fact that apparently my children do not fit the mould of people's perceptions of what autism looks like. Pray do tell, what does autism look like?

So here is an open letter to all teachers in the future that may teach my little superheroes, or any other children for that matter, who require the use of visual aides or sensory breaks in class!

Dear Teacher,

My child has been placed into your class for this school year and as such I am putting my trust in you, that you will do the right thing by my children. Both of my children are eager little learners but there is a slight difference between my children and the other children that have been placed in your class.

You see, my children have autism, sensory processing difficulties and they learn differently to other children in your class.

First up, can you please place what you know about autism into the back of your mind - keep it somewhere easy to access but not directly at the fore front of your mind when you meet my child for the first time. You see there is a saying that goes "so you've met one child with autism, you've met one child with autism."

Every individual who is on the autism spectrum presents differently. Please don't assume that you know everything about autism based on your previous encounters with children who are on the spectrum. You know about how those children present with autism. You know very little about how my children present with autism. By the end of the school year you will know about how my children present with autism.

Just because my child doesn't fit into the idea, the perceptions, that you have about autism, doesn't mean that he will be able to cope in your classroom without assistance. Yes both of my children are verbal, but that does not mean that they understand your instructions. You may need to walk my child through what you want him to do. You may need to provide step by step instructions.

Every child has a different learning style, my children are no different. Both of my children are visual learners. Both of my children benefit from the use of visual schedules, social stories and visual choice boards in class.

My children's Occupational Therapist and Speech Therapist have put a lot of time and effort into creating numerous visual aides for us to utilise at home as well as for you to use in the classroom. 

The great thing about this is that you do not have to prepare any visuals, we will provide them all for you. All that we ask is that you actively use them in class with my child. Please do not put them in a basket and think that my child will access them by himself - he does not yet know how to independently use them. You will need to prompt him to use them.

These visuals make my children's lives a lot easier for them to understand and manage. When you start utilising them in your classroom, I can guarantee that you find teaching my child a much easier task.

We will also provide a sensory tool kit for my children to use in their respective classes. Both of my children enter into sensory overload on a regular basis. You may or may not notice when this occurs but believe me, we see the fall out at home after school. Every day.

When we say that they have had a rough afternoon, evening or night, please believe us. We do not make these things up for the hell of it. Just because you have not witnessed a meltdown at school, doesn't mean that they don't occur. You are more than welcome to visit our house anytime after three thirty in the afternoon after school on any school day to witness a meltdown. Please be warned, meltdowns are emotionally, mentally and physically draining for everyone.

My son needs regular sensory breaks to keep himself on track. Please let him have these sensory breaks. There is even a sensory break choice board for you to use.

Please let my children keep their sensory tool kits in an easily accessible place in class where they know where it is kept. A sensory tool kit is no use whatsoever when it is hidden from their sight. And heads up, if it is hidden from them, neither of my children will ask to use the sensory tools. It simply does not occur to them to ask.

Again you will see the benefits for allowing them to use their sensory tool kits in class.

I will apologise in advance if you feel that I am over stepping my mark as a parent, but I am my children's advocate. Neither of my children have yet found their voice to be their own advocate, so in the meantime, I am it.

I look forward to this year and hope that you enjoy having my child in your class.

Kind Regards,

This concerned Mumma Bear!

Random things that my little superheroes have said!

Back in February I published a post about some of the ridiculous obscure things that I have said out loud to my little superheroes.

Well now it is the little superheroes turn as they too say some completely random things. The difference being that neither O nor L see anything ridiculous about what are they saying.

That's the literal side of their autism showing. If you ask a silly question in superhero headquarters, you will get a very honest straight face dead pan answer. I started writing down some of O and L's doozies because they really are, in my opinion, hilarious!

O is obsessed with being 17 and she is constantly asking questions about things that she wants me to teach her when she is 17, this is one such question that took a turn for the unexpected.
O: Mum when I'm 17 can you teach me how to drive?
Me: Darling I've already said that when you are 17 I will teach you how to drive.
O: No Mum, when I'm 17, before you die, will you teach me how to drive?
I was utterly speechless. Huh, what do you know that I don't???

O's class at school were learning about Fiji for Harmony Day and O would come home each day telling us different facts and figures about Fiji, this is one!
O: Mum, in Fiji, they only live to 67, so if we lived there you wouldn't have much time left!
Thanks child!

We took the little superheroes to a distillery for lunch and as we were walking to the outdoor play area L came out with "Oooh, that's just fancy!"

I was sitting on our office chair trying, and I emphasise trying, to check emails. L came to me and asked very politely if he could have the chair.
Me: But I am using it at the moment, you can have it after I have finished, okay?
L: You not spinning!
Me: I don't want to spin, I just want to sit in it.
L: That using it wrong!
What could I say but give him the chair!

There was an eerily quietness that had descended upon superhero headquarters so I went to try and find out what the little superheroes were up to.
Me: What are you doing?
O and L: Nothing!
Me: Is that the same kind of nothing that broke the sliding door?
O: No that was a different kind of nothing! This is just nothing.
Me thinks that they were up to something.

The little superheroes were having a shouting match in the toy room over what game to play. After they had finished I was talking to O about the shouting.
Me: Being the loudest does not make you right O!
O: Nope, but it makes me not hear him being wrong!

We were at our local shopping centre and a bald man walked past. L burst out laughing and said, very very loudly much to the amusement of those around us "Oooo he got naked head!"

L and O were tearing around the house and were starting to knock furniture over.
Me: You two are skating on thin ice at the moment.
O: We're not on skates, we're running on the floor.
Me: It's an expression.
L: No it the floor!

At one of the little superheroes swimming lessons L decided that he needed to wear swimming fins. Somehow, and I am still not sure how, he accidentally hit himself in the head with a fin while it was on his foot. L came out with "Well, that just woke me up!" Lorraine his instructor needed to compose herself before continuing the lesson!

L crawled onto Daddy Superhero's lap one morning for a cuddle and said "You don't smell funny now!
Lovely and good morning to you!

O and L were having a conversation about Daddy superhero getting old.
L: "When Daddy grows old, he get to be baby again."
O piped up with "No when Daddy gets really old, he'll lose stuff and then die."
L - "Oh!"
And play continued like nothing had ever happened, meanwhile I'm quietly laughing in the kitchen.

I went down to L's bedroom and he'd made one huge mess, there was no floor space showing so I asked him who made the mess and he replied very matter of fact "A hologram."
Me: Since when do you know what a hologram is?
L: Since I sawed one make the mess!

I was talking with L about listening to Daddy superhero when he had asked L to help tidy his room.

Me: If Daddy asks you to do something then you need to do it, okay?
L: Even fart or burp or eat all the donuts?
Yep, had that one coming.

I've said it once before and I will say it again, my little superheroes are bona fide smart asses some times!!

Anzac Day

Tomorrow April 25 is Anzac Day and it is one of Australia and New Zealand's most important national occasions.

This year marks 102 years since the original Anzac's landed at Gallipoli in 1915.

102 years since the first major military action fought by Australian and New Zealand forces during the First World War.

For those who are not aware, and hopefully there are not too many of you, Anzac stands for Australian and New Zealand Army Corp. The soldiers that were in the Australian and New Zealand forces very quickly became known as the Anzacs, they took a great deal of pride in the name that was given to them and that pride remains today in generations of Australians and New Zealanders who stop to remember.

Anzac Day goes beyond the anniversary of the landing at Gallipoli in 1915.

Anzac Day is the day when we stop and remember all Australian and New Zealanders who have served and died in war and on operational service.

Anzac Day is when we stop and show support to all those solders both past and present who have seen the worst of our world and yet they did not try to hide. Instead they entered those areas with faith, hope and courage. We stop and remember all those soldiers who entered the darkest time of our history to fight in hope of bringing light to it.

On Anzac Day we stop in silence and take a moment to remember and give thanks to those soldiers who were able to keep the darkness at bay. We also stop and give thanks to those who continue to keep it at bay.

The people who serve in our Armed Forces, past, present and future and no matter what capacity or rank they serve as, have chosen to stand and protect. They do not get a say in where they go, what they see, hear and feel or what they risk. They do this because they believe in a better future where all humankind will not have to make the same sacrifices that they have done and continue to do so.

On Anzac Day, my family stops to remember our relatives who fought for our country and lost their lives. We stop to show support to those relatives and friends who are current serving members of our countries armed forces.

On Anzac Day we stop to keep the spirit of the Anzac alive. We remember the qualities of courage, mateship and sacrifice that these soldier's carried with them and hope that we too can continue the Anzac tradition and carry these qualities with us throughout our lives.

"They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old;
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them."

Lest We Forget

The Ode, For the Fallen by Laurence Binyon

My Mummy IEP

Over the past week I have decided that I need a Mummy IEP.

What is an IEP I hear you ask? An IEP or an Individualised Education Plan is a document that is developed by teachers and other education professionals for children with special needs.

An IEP is developed with the child's education goals as well as any social, physical and behavioural difficulties or goals in mind and it is generally completed in consultation with the child's teachers, aides and parents. The IEP is reviewed periodically.

Regardless of the age or developmental level of the child, there are several things that the IEP should contain.......

........ An IEP should outline a meaningful education program, it should be age appropriate, flexible and future orientated.

........ An IEP should consider the development of the child's life skills and it should include short term goals that will lead up to the achievement of long term goals. The goals must be measurable and achievable and include a time frame as to when they should be achieved by.

........ An IEP should also include any shared resonsibilities so that all parties involved know what is expected of them in assisting the child to achieve their goals.

So back to my Mummy IEP.

Objective 1: To complete the household laundry in a timely manner.

Goal 1:

To remember to take the wet washing out of the washing machine once the cycle has finished and not have to rewash the load 2 or 3 times. This needs to be done a minimum of 3 out of 5 times with 75% accuracy.

Date Started: Too many years ago to mention.

Date Mastered: Minimum progress has been shown thus far. 

Behaviour Intervention Plan is recommended with a reward system in place to earn rewards such as a hot coffee, chocolate or a glass of wine.

Goal 2:

To remember to hang the washing out on the washing line instead of having to rewash it as the clothes smell stale because they have been sitting in the basket in the laundry for two days. This needs to be done a minimum of 3 out of 5 times with 75% accuracy.

Date Started: Too many years ago to mention.

Date Mastered: Minimum progress has been shown thus far.

Behaviour Intervention Plan is recommended with a reward system in place to earn rewards such as hot coffee, chocolate or a glass of wine.

Goal 3: 

To bring in the washing from the washing line once it is dry before it starts to fade and because the washing line is not a wardrode. This needs to be done a minimum of 3 out of 5 times with 75% accuracy.

Date Started: Too many years ago to mention.

Date Mastered: Minimum progress has been shown thus far. 

Behaviour Intervention Plan is recommended with a reward system in place to earn rewards such as hot coffee, chocolate or a glass of wine.

Shared Responsibility: All other members of Superhero headquarters need to remind Mummy that the washing is still on the line.

Goal 4:

To fold said washing before it turns into Mount Clothesmore and the little superheroes start mountaineering to retrieve their clothes. This needs to be done a minimum of 3 out of 5 times with 75% accuracy.

Date Started: Too many years ago to mention.

Date Mastered: Minimum progress has been shown thus far.


Behaviour Intervention Plan is recommended with a reward system in place to earn rewards such as hot coffee or a glass of wine.

Shared Responsibilities: All parties in superhero headquarters need to chip in and help out with the folding of Mount Clothesmore. Recommended to establish a visual board with prompts and then scale back the prompts as progress is shown because to be perfectly honest, this may be a bit too ambitious.

A team meeting is needed so that the superhero team can re-evaluate this goal.

Objective 2: To sleep in own bed.

Goal 1:

To sleep in my own bed for the entire night instead of on the couch or in the recliner or in a little superheroes bed. This needs to be done a minimum of 5 out of 7 nights with 75% accuracy.

Date Started: 26/02/2009

Date Mastered: Minimum progress has been shown thus far.


Behaviour Intervention Plan is recommended with a reward system in place to earn rewards such as hot coffee or a glass of wine.

Shared Responsibilities: The little superheroes need to sleep in their OWN beds so that Mummy can achieve the sleep level that she requires to be a functioning member of society instead of being a Mummy Zombie. Recommended to establish a visual board with prompts and then scale back the prompts as progress is shown because to be perfectly honest, this may be a bit too ambitious.

A team meeting is needed so that the superhero team can re-evaluate this goal.

Wine, chocolate and hot coffee are an autism Mums greatest incentive!

Phrases that you don't want to hear a doctor say!

There are certain phrases that you just do not want to hear your doctor say. Ever. These are phrases that invoke panic and fear and uncertainty and confusion and they are generally not great for your mental well-being.

Last week we experienced an incident such as this.

On Wednesday morning, L woke with a rash on his tummy and a sore right ear so it was off to see our wonderful, understanding and very patient GP.

He took one look at L's rash and said "well, it isn't chicken pox (thank goodness as I was dreading having a weeks holiday with a child with chicken pox) let's look in your ear."

The GP took a look in L's right ear and wouldn't you know it, the ear was inflamed and infected, hence the cause of the rash.

The GP then checked L's left ear and his exact words were "what's that?"

Huh? What on earth are you talking about?

Seeing the confused look on my face he continued with "come over here and look!"

As I went over I was thinking WTF am I about to see and when I looked through the ear scopy thingy I saw what the GP saw, a tiny blue bead.

What the hell? Why? Just why? And then how? And then why again!

Well of course L wouldn't let the GP anywhere near him. Our GP can't say that I didn't warn him first, so it was off to our local hospital.

You know that you frequent the Accident and Emergency department too often when the Triage nurse recognies your child and says "what have done this time buddy?" On the bright side L brightened right up when he saw his favourite nurse!

And of course the attending doctor then says "I haven't removed anything from a child's ear before today." Of course you haven't, well he has autism and won't let you go near his head without a fight, sedation is a good place to start.

Nope let's just hold L down on the bed and try our luck with a tiny suction gadget thingy. You'd think that I should know the names of the gadgets by now but nope. Not a chance, I have too many other terms and information to remember.

With a lot of screaming and L tensing the doctor was able to get the blue bead out. Then when she went to check L's ear, the words "ahhhh, Dr ............ there's another one."

Of course there is!

They weren't so successful at getting the second one out and told us that we would have to go up to the Children's Hospital the following day to get it removed as they had a special unit especially designed for getting foreign objects out of children's ears and noses. When we heard this part, Daddy superhero and I both started giggling.

Sometimes you just have to laugh!! If you don't laugh you will cry and at stage we had L on the bed sobbing his heart out and O screaming like a banshee under the table as there was blood everywhere and her little brother was crying. Yep, they'd managed to damage L's ear canal in the process of trying to remove the second bead.

So a visit to the Children's hospital occurred on Thursday last week. L had his fourth general anesthetic in 3 and a half years and the said bead was removed from L's ear.

When L realised it was a green bead, he said "oh my favourite colour!"

Yes it is buddy but why is it in your ear?!?

L has been proudly telling anyone and everyone about the beads in his ear and has stored the two little specimen jars in a Batman tin for safe keeping. Isn't that where everyone keeps souvenirs from a hospital stay?

I in the meantime, every time I see a little bead on the floor I am throwing them in the bin. Never to see the light of day again.

And the rest of the beads kit has been stored away somewhere where I will hopefully forget where I put them so that when O and L want to play with them I can respond with "I'm really sorry but I'm not sure where they are."

Or, even better, hopefully the little superheroes will forget all about them and the offending beads can be slyly thrown away next time we do a big clean out!

Life is never dull!

A visit to the beach

Each year Sculpture by the Sea, Cottlesloe is held on the gorgeous Cottlesloe Beach. We all love the beach and Daddy superhero and I love art, so it combines all our interests. Every year we make plans to go but never actually end up getting there, we're always way laid with other plans or prior commitments.

After baking bread this morning, we decided that we would brave the nasty looking storm clouds and do a spur of the moment drive to Cottlesloe. All the way to Cottlesloe we heard the obligatory "are we there yet?" and "how much longer?" When we arrived I am glad that we did make the drive.

When we got out of the car, both O and L saw the beach and were off. And then they saw the tee pees, I could see their brains ticking over as we walked down the pathway as to what to do first. Ocean or tee pees!

O and L jumped straight into what looked like a bean bag before realising that they weren't that comfortable after all. They were then off to the water's edge to collect shells and play in the water.

We slowly started meandering down the beach, Daddy superhero and I tag teaming to look at the sculptures while the little superheros played on the beach. The sculptures didn't disappoint, they were amazing, some even caught the attention of my little superheroes.

L was very excited when he heard and saw some Black Hawk Helicopters "Just like cousin Mikeys!" Obviously not part of the exhibition but still very impressive.

But in the end the beach, water and shells won out. The little superheroes had a ball. They dug holes and channels, they built sandcastles, they chased the waves and collected shells. They had sand in places where sand probably shouldn't go, but they had fun.

L was convinced that there were BIG sharks in the water and collected a handful of sand that he carted down the beach as he desperately wanted to feed the said sharks!

We were even able to have a family photo taken while we sat on one of the sculptures, although convincing O that we were allowed to did take a while!

And thankfully the rain held off until we got back into the car to drive home.

If you ask L what the highlight of the impromptu drive was? Hearing the shark siren as we walked from the car to find some lunch but he was very disappointed that he couldn't see the sharks! Next time buddy, next time!

Welcome to Superhero Cooking School!

Both of my little superheroes have aversions to particular foods but we are very fortunate that they both are reasonably good eaters.

Whether we are cooking in the kitchen or outside on the barbeque, one or both of the little superheroes can be found hovering around wanting to help mix or offering to be a taste tester.

From a young age O has always been interested in helping in the kitchen and she's always expressed her desire to learn how to cook. She received a kids cook book for her birthday a few years ago and she is constantly picking recipes out of it to cook with us.

L has always been intrigued by cooking shows and he just loves food in general! Other than superhero shows and movies, he will sit and watch a cooking show!

Just recently we've been watching a children's cooking show that is based in the US. After watching an episode L said to us "when I get big, I go on a cooking show." He has big ambitions which is wonderful. O then chimed in and asked when could they help to cook dinner.

So on Friday afternoon on the way home from school, Daddy superhero took both little superheroes to the shops and together they picked out the ingredients to make several meals over the weekend.

On Saturday I was lucky enough to have a night off from kitchen duties as Daddy superhero, L and O took over and made hamburgers.

There were some interesting conversations happening around the dining room table as they made the hamburgers:

"How is mince chopped?" and "Why can't I eat the egg shell?" and "Ooh that feels disgusting!" We need to refine L's technique for cracking an egg, there were lots of little bits of egg shell that needed to be retrieved from the mince!

Both of my little superheroes had a go at using the vegetable peeler and the grater and no one lost any fingers!

Mixing all the ingredients together with their hands got lots of "ooh disgusting" remarks from L!

The end result were very delicious hamburgers which O picked at and L refused to eat! If we had mushed the hamburgers up and called it mince, they would have eaten it for sure!  Food aversions, oh well!

This morning Daddy superhero was woken to a little voice saying "It's bread making time!" O couldn't wait to make her bread, she got stuck straight into it so I missed taking photos, was my turn for a sleep in!

Nothing better than a fresh loaf of bread for breakfast!

When Daddy superhero asked L if he wanted to make his bread he replied with "no, wait for Mummy!" and I was promptly woken up.

As L was pouring the flour into his bowl, he dropped the bag and a huge flour cloud rose up. L's response was "Cool, I like a scientist!"

Both of the little superheroes were fascinated by the rising dough! They wanted to know all the ins and out of how yeast helps the dough to rise.

L's bread looked great as well but no photos were allowed. Both the little superheroes did a wonderful job with helping with the hamburgers and the bread making. Apparently the next recipe that O wants to have a go at is a chocolate sponge cake.

And throughout the whole process, Daddy superhero didn't lose his cool once!!